Stop Trying to Be a Bush, Already.

Romans 12:6 “Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them…”

 

I was 6 feet tall in 6th grade.  Back then, all I wanted to be was short.  I actually pleaded with God to make me short.

In Junior high, I was the only white girl in a youth group of 200 African Americans.  And you better believe all I wanted to be was Black.

I wanted to marry a pastor who could break out into song while he preached.

I planned to live in Pittsburgh and raise my 2 little girls, living somewhere just off of Walnut Street.

I prayed hard for these things.  Fervently even.  But here’s the deal:  I’m still a tall white girl whose married to a tone deaf intellectual while living in Europe with my two toddler boys.

Why do we try so desperately to be something we are not called to be?

On day #1 of my “Be Joshua” Journey (See: I Got Your Back.), I randomly stopped dead in my tracks to look up at the blue sky forming around me. I had the feeling I needed to take in this moment.  What I saw directly in front of me was a 50 foot bush.  No joke.  And, high up in that blue sky, were the big strong branches of a mammoth tree springing out from inside that crazy bush.  I have lived one street away from this thing for 4 years and this was the first time I’d noticed it.

I took a picture and stood there looking at it for a long time.  This is what the Lord showed me:

Stop trying to be a bush.  You are a tree.  You are not a bush.  You look ridiculous trying to be a bush.  You are better than a bush.  And that bush just might over take you.

Romans 12:6 tells us, in essence, that our gifts differ from one another.  Even where our gifts overlap with those around us, the grace we have to use them differs from me to you.

Taking ownership of who you are called to be, and then using the talents you already have to be the greatest version of you… That’s what it’s about.  You want to find happiness?  Be you.  It’s not about being that person you’ve always been secretly jealous over.   As women, we are especially good at doing this.  So much so, that sometime we no longer actually know who we are underneath all the striving and struggling to be something we aren’t.

Are we to grow and change in seasons of our lives?  Absolutely.  Will we learn and be inspired because of those around us?  We’d be foolish not to.  But remember: Being the best version of yourself will never require a disguise.

You are not a bush.  And why on earth would we choose to be one anyway?  Underneath all those over-grown weeds is where all the strength and beauty lies.  Be that.